The gun safe was in Alex's closet and he had crouched down to open it. At Michael's words, though, Alex felt that urge to hit something again. Instead, he picked up the bag of mostly water now that he'd put down in order to get to the safe and threw it at Michael's head. He hadn't smashed his hand against the wall because he didn't care.
He could just open the safe and write down a few combinations and passwords and be done with it. Be done with Michael. But that was the thing, wasn't it? He felt as if he'd never be done with Michael. Not as long as he was in Roswell. Not as long as he was anywhere.
"It doesn't matter because I'm tired," he said, getting to his feet slowly without opening the safe. "I'm tired of trying to figure out what this back and forth between us is because all we ever manage to do is dance around. One of us takes a step forward and the other a step back. It doesn't matter because you don't know me. Not if you think I'd have left willingly for the military of all places. It doesn't matter because I know. Enough that you can justify talking to me, telling me about you without thinking you've betrayed anything or anyone."
He took a step closer to Michael. "If you want the buzzword for proof, alien. You're not human, Michael, except in all the ways that count."
Because the way Michael looked at him? That was all too human. So was the way it felt to be curled up next to him in the morning in those hours when anything seemed possible before the weight of the day crushed him back into silence.
"So no, it doesn't matter because I'm not going to take anything my dad says as the truth. But I'm also not going to go digging any more than I already have for the truth. You want me to know, you can tell me. So do you want to talk or am I getting that information for you so you can be the one who leaves this time?"
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momijizukamori
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Date: 2019-03-21 06:41 pm (UTC)He could just open the safe and write down a few combinations and passwords and be done with it. Be done with Michael. But that was the thing, wasn't it? He felt as if he'd never be done with Michael. Not as long as he was in Roswell. Not as long as he was anywhere.
"It doesn't matter because I'm tired," he said, getting to his feet slowly without opening the safe. "I'm tired of trying to figure out what this back and forth between us is because all we ever manage to do is dance around. One of us takes a step forward and the other a step back. It doesn't matter because you don't know me. Not if you think I'd have left willingly for the military of all places. It doesn't matter because I know. Enough that you can justify talking to me, telling me about you without thinking you've betrayed anything or anyone."
He took a step closer to Michael. "If you want the buzzword for proof, alien. You're not human, Michael, except in all the ways that count."
Because the way Michael looked at him? That was all too human. So was the way it felt to be curled up next to him in the morning in those hours when anything seemed possible before the weight of the day crushed him back into silence.
"So no, it doesn't matter because I'm not going to take anything my dad says as the truth. But I'm also not going to go digging any more than I already have for the truth. You want me to know, you can tell me. So do you want to talk or am I getting that information for you so you can be the one who leaves this time?"